


All About Ayumu

by Zinthezinner



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival ALL STARS (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Ayumu Goes Emo, Delusions of Reference, F/F, Gen, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:28:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24702316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zinthezinner/pseuds/Zinthezinner
Summary: Ayumu has connected the two dots.She didn't connect shit.She's connected them.It's all about her.
Relationships: Takasaki Yuu/Uehara Ayumu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	All About Ayumu

“Hey Yu-chan, do you see those people there?” Ayumu whispers.  
“The ones on the seats or the ones standing?”  
“The ones on the seats. I think they’re talking about me!”  
  
Yu surreptitiously looks past Ayumu to the people seated further down the train. They are talking, but it’s hard to hear, and there’s no indication that they would be talking about her.  
  
“What makes you think that?”  
“I dunno, the vibe? They must’ve been at my concert!”  
“‘The vibe’?”  
  
Such a simple question, but it catches Ayumu off guard. How _did_ she know they were talking about them? What kind of a vibe?  
  
“Hmmm… I don’t really know how to explain it better aha, sorry…”  
“Hmmm… alright.”  
  


* * *

  
“Hey Yu-chan, this new song… is it about me..?”  
“It’s for you to sing, but I’m not sure what you mean by ‘about’?”  
“I mean… is it about you and I? Do you… have feelings for me?”  
  
Yu blushes a little, but it might be nothing, she’s not sure. God, why did she say that? There’s no way she has feelings for her, don’t be silly Ayumu, she hasn’t liked you so far. You’re never going to be a couple, she doesn’t care like that. You’re just friends just friends just friends just friends just friends just friends just-  
  
“Just idol stuff, that’s all it is. You know how it goes, appealing to an audience with that sort of thing. I don’t- it’s not really that.”  
“Oh… right. Sorry for suggesting that, I was out of line.”  
“Don’t worry about it, we can forget about it.”  
“R. Right. Yeah, we can forget about it…”  
  
Ayumu can feel a tightening in her chest, and she swallows. Oh no, it’s awkward! She coughs.  
  
“... Do you like the lyrics though? I can change them if you’re not comfortable singing them.”  
“No no, it’s fine! I like the lyrics. Thank you!”  
  
She looks so tired… there’s no way you could ask her to rewrite them all by herself. Just sing the song, don’t worry about it.  
  


* * *

  
“Hey Yu-chan, did you see the tweet I linked you to?”  
“The one about the boring fluffy songs?”  
“Yeah, that one.”  
“What about it?”  
“Do you think it’s vagueing about me?”  
“What?”  
  
H.  
  
“I mean, I’m very girly, and I don’t really dip into the cooler stuff like Karin-san and Setsuna-chan, or the cooler units like BiBi and Guilty Kiss, so…”  
“You want to branch out?”  
“Maybe? It’s gotta be a sign, so I probably should…”  
“I can try writing something with a cooler vibe if you want, and you can see if you like it or not.”  
“Mmm… that could be good! Don’t overwork yourself though, okay? I’ll message you to check so you don’t lose track of time.”  
“But won’t you lose sleep?”  
“Not if you sleep when you’re supposed to!”  
“Can’t argue with that.”  
  


* * *

  
“Hey Yu-chan, it’s pretty good how the live was cancelled, right?”  
“You didn’t want to perform?”  
“No, it’s not like that! We have an important test soon, remember? It’s like they cancelled it so we’d have more time to study!”  
“Like fate or something?”  
  
A lot of things seem to be lining up for Ayumu lately, so yeah! Like fate.  
  
“Mhmm! Things really line up sometimes, huh? The universe must really like me.”  
  
Ayumu smiles, but Yu’s return smile isn’t as wide.  
  
“I guess, but not everything is about you.”  
“About me?”  
“I don’t think they’d cancel a show just for one student’s test, even if you are cute.”  
“I’m cute?”  
“Well yeah, you’re adorable. You’re sweet, you’re soft, you're pure, you look pretty. Being endearing is a charm point of yours, but I don’t think cancelling a live over a test is worth it for that.”  
  
Ayumu can feel a blush rising in her cheeks, and does her best to suppress it. She doesn’t like you like that, you’re just friends. Calling people cute is normal! You call stuff and people cute all the time! It’s nothing.  
  
“Right, guess it’s just a lucky coincidence.”  
“Is it that lucky?”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Are you nervous about your new song or something? It’s not done yet, but I can show you what I’ve got later and we can revise.”  
“No no, it’s fine!”  
“...”  
  
Yu tries to read her friend’s face, and Ayumu squirms beneath her gaze.  
  
“Well, maybe it is that. But! It’s just new, right? Everyone gets nervous about new stuff. It’s kind of exciting too!”  
“Alright. I’ll show you tomorrow then? I’m a bit busy tonight.”  
“Tomorrow is Saturday, right?”  
“Mhmmm.”  
“Do you want me to come over at dinner then? It can be like old times!”  
“Sounds good!”  
  


* * *

  
“Hey Yu-chan! Do you like my outfit?”  
“It’s… different. Trying to channel the cool vibes, are we?”  
“Yup! Do you like it?”  
“Yeah! Looks almost emo? I didn’t know you had clothes like this.”  
  
She likes it! She actually likes it? Maybe this is how you can get her to like you!  
  
“Mmm, well I kinda pieced it together with what I had lying around. I had this cute stripy long-sleeved shirt and this black short-sleeved one lying around from other outfits and theatre, and I figured they’d look good with the grey short-shorts and black stockings, and the sneakers just kinda made sense, so…”  
“Yeah, I get it. It does kinda make sense when I think about it as individual pieces you happened to have rather than a whole outfit.”  
“Mhm! May I come inside?”  
“Sure! Dinner should be almost ready by now.”  
“It already smells nice…”  
  
Ayumu heads inside, and they wave to Yu’s dad.  
  
“Ayumu-chan, hello! You’re dressing a bit strangely today, is there an occasion Yu-chan didn’t tell me about?”  
“Oh, no occasion! Yu-chan is just writing a song about me with an image change, so I figured I’d try dressing the part, that’s all!”  
“I’ll never understand the fashions of today for the life of me! Well, have fun anyway. Dinner is almost done.”  
“Thank you! It smells really good.”  
  


* * *

  
“Hey Yu-chan… this one’s definitely about me, right?”  
“Yeah, it’s a solo song I wrote specifically about you. It’s got your name all over it, literally. ‘Visions of below’, which has a part of your name in it. It’s about imagining yourself fail, which I notice you do sometimes. The bridge here reuses parts of one of your other solos, though I did remix them to mesh better with the tone. So yeah, it is about you.”  
  
Ayumu looks through the lyrics again silently, picking out key phrases.  
  
_Tears blur my vision_ _  
_ _Will I ever see you again?_ _  
_ _Will I ever wake up?_ _  
_ _Do I have to say goodbye?_ _  
_ _  
_ _One step forwards, two steps back_ _  
_ _Two steps forwards, one step back_ _  
_ _Did I even move at all?_  
  
It’s hard to hear herself singing with a powerful voice in the first place, certainly lyrics like these. If she says them, they might come true. Maybe you’ll lose her, even though you’re doing this weird stuff to try and keep her.  
  
“Do I really come off as nervous enough to write a song about it? That’s kind of embarrassing…”  
“You do worry quite a bit, yeah. I’m kinda hoping this gives you a boost with the change of pace, maybe you’ll feel more confident when you’re in a confident aspect?”  
“Confident aspect, huh? Maybe I could start by singing something cooler with A・ZU・NA, but I dunno if they’d want to do that with me…”  
  
A. You shouldn’t’ve said that, that’s even more work for her! Plus, you don’t even know if Setsuna-chan and Shizuku-chan would want that! Well, maybe Setsuna-chan would be hype, but would the hardcore stuff really interest Shizuku-chan?  
  
“You could always message them and ask? I’m pretty sure they’d love it.”  
“Maybe later!”  
  
The twintailed girl moves from her desk to her bed and pats it, gesturing for her friend - her friend her friend her friend, the one she likes as a friend if that, please be a friend please friend friend friend - to sit beside her. Ayumu does this, feeling and squashing the shakes that accompany her.  
  
“Ayumu-chan, I know you worry about me a lot. Well, it’s my turn to worry about you!”  
“It is?”  
“It is. You’ve been acting really self-obsessed lately, or-”  
“Self-obsessed?!?”  
  
Uh. Ouch!  
  
“Maybe paranoid fits better? Or maybe not quite. You seem to think everyone’s talking about you. I figured it might’ve been coincidence, but lately it’s happening a lot. You keep showing me posts you think are about you, you talk about fans, you’re acting like events in the world like the rain or the live being cancelled are done for you. You keep zoning out, and sometimes it’s hard to talk to you.”  
“Oh… I guess…”  
“I don’t think this is normal, and… I don’t think it’s you, Ayumu-chan!”  
“Y-you think I’ve been replaced?”  
  
Now that’s a theory. What i-  
  
“No no! I mean it’s not totally in-character for you to be this preoccupied with meaning. I’m worried you might need help with something.”  
“You’re r-really that concerned?”  
  
Yu wipes Ayumu’s eyes, alerting her to the fact that they were wet. She hadn’t noticed she’d started crying.  
  
“Of course I am. I really like you, you’re my best friend!”  
  
She tenses up, feeling a wave of dizziness as more tears prick at her eyes. Is this pain or relief?  
  
She doesn’t hate you, which is good. She’s not going to leave you unless you mess up here, which is good. Friends is good, right? You’re so worried about her not liking you, you should be happy with this much! You want to support her. You want to be close to her. You want to be closer to her closer to her closer closer closer-  
  
She is closer. Yu has pulled her into a hug. Realising this, Ayumu hugs back. Hard. She gets rubs on the back and whispered “It’s okay”s and “Good girl”s.  
  
Eventually the pounding in her skull eases off, and Ayumu relaxes into the embrace.  
  
“It’s okay, we’ll get through this. We can really be about you for a bit if you want.”

**Author's Note:**

> god. ayemo and scenetsuna are CONCEPTS. idk what to call shizuku if they went that route but god if azuna went that way... that's a concept. that's a concept. I know they wouldn't refuse, ayumu's just being self-conscious. there was a scrapped scene where she does message them and setsuna is OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. I decided it was kinda pointless and made the fic too long, but you're welcome for that mental image at the end here!  
> yes I like repeating elements, the symbolism is intentional.


End file.
